Releasing the Past

So many people I’ve worked with over these past couple of weeks have felt “muddled”; unclear, confused, stuck, and indecisive.  People and situations from the past have reappeared casting doubt and fear based triggers insinuating the worst of it isn’t over and we’ve been deluding ourselves.

Tomorrow there is new moon solar eclipse that is being touted as the end all and be all of new beginnings, marked with an intensity that has the potential to not only burst open the floodgates of prosperity and abundance but also provide the discipline and focus to carry out our intentions and dreams.  Sounds pretty damn good to me!  I have to admit there is a part of me that is thinking, ok, and then I’ll spin around 3 times, click my heels together and skip down the Yellow Brick Road.

The eternal optimist in me so wants to believe these assurances that we’ve finally made it to the crossroad between indecision and moving forward.  The astrological sky is filled with nodes, T squares, aspects and even asteroid Goddesses to launch this energy akin to a Law of Attraction style of manifestation.

With these energies is also the predilection towards revisiting our shadow self, past life issues and childhood woundings. My initial reaction wants to scream “No! We’ve been through enough of that shit, no more!”  But does it need to arise again to finally release it and be put to rest?  Can we complete this cycle with a finality which allows us to embark on a new beginning, a fresh start? Change can be a good thing helping us to break free from stagnancy and outdated self reflections.

During a particularly painful and emotional exchange with someone who was very close to me, I abruptly stopped talking and said thank you. “What the hell are you thanking me for?!” was the expected and immediate response. “Thank you, you’ve played a big part in helping me be who I am here and now.” I’d like to say there was a warm group hug that led to a lively rendition of Kumbaya but it didn’t quite play out that way.  But what did change was my reaction to a situation that had manifested in so many different scenarios for a long, long time.

Revisiting old pain isn’t on the top of most people’s emotional to do list.  Avoidance leaves you stuck in the past and unable to fully embrace love, happiness, joy and fulfillment in the present.  Deepak Chopra gives the following seven steps to help free yourself from emotional baggage.

1. Recall an Emotion. Close your eyes and recall an uncomfortable emotional experience.  See it as clearly as you can. Dredging up these emotional triggers may suck but it also helps you to break free and start healing your heart.

2. Feel Your Body. Does your stomach or heart area feel tight, stiff, uncomfortable or even painful?  Discomfort may also manifest in your head or throat.  A feeling of numbness often indicates fear related to the incident. According to Chopra, “an emotion is a thought connected to a sensation”.

3. Label Your Emotion. Give the emotion you’re feeling a name.  Be specific.  I feel bad doesn’t cut it. Common painful emotions are:

  • Anger, hostility, rage
  • Sadness, grief, sorrow
  • Envy, jealousy
  • Anxiety, fear, worry, apprehension
  • Resentment
  • Humiliation
  • Rejection
  • Shame

 

4. Express the Experience.  Write down what happened and try to capture as many details of how you felt, what the other person did, and how you reacted afterwards. Next, take a second piece of paper and retell what happened from the other person’s point of view.  This is difficult but it helps give you perspective. Lastly, write it out again in third person as an objective bystander which helps you to emotionally detach and see the situation with more clarity.

5. Share Your Experience.  Read your 3 accounts to someone else who will listen and has your best interests at heart.  Here’s a glitch for those of us who are very private or like to process on our own. Using a journal and writing as if to a dear friend can also bring the clarity you may need before you talk to someone else about it.  Writing it out makes it real, sharing it gives it voice.

6. Ritual of Release.  Take your 3 written accounts and burn them, tear them up, drown them, whatever will provide a ceremony of releasing that past connection to the emotional trigger. This ritual severs the past from the present.  (Here’s a hint, some of the deep stuff takes more than once!)

7. Celebrate Your Release. This can be private or public but through doing this, it validates that you’ve taken the steps to release that which has been holding you emotionally hostage.

If there is credence to new energies being available with tomorrow’s super moon, perhaps it is best served by driving out of the emotional cul-de-sac and releasing what no longer serves you. Surrender to your divine inner guidance and follow your intuitive flashes. Be as fully present as possible and visualize your part in selfless service to a higher cause. Though many of us strive to live by these guidelines, tomorrow could be the day that brings it that much closer to our truth.

 

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